Michael Avenatti: The jackass, dissected

Want a good morning laugh?

Get a load of National Review's Kyle Smith and his hilarious vivisection of Michael Avenatti, whose rise and fall show just how absurd he and his Democratic cheerleaders always were.  Here's the start of the piece and don't tell me you don't want to read further:

Remember when Michael Avenatti was the Democrats' big hope for 2020?  He wasn't just that, though.  Parachuting in to launch his presidential campaign to the DNC's "Ethnic Council" and its black caucus in Chicago in August, he enthusiastically adopted the party's guiltspeak.  "People that look like me, white men, we need to stand up," he told his minority audience, exactly the kind of cost-free identity-politics self-castigation without which no Democrat can hope to rise very far.  In the same month, Avenatti spoke at the "Democratic Wing Ding" dinner in Iowa and announced plans to visit at least 20 more states.

The response was fanatical.  Avenatti was hailed as a hybrid attack dog and sex god.  All Democrats bowed to the Trumpslayer.  Picture a two-fisted, high-T version of 2008 Barack Obama, and you'll have some idea of how professional Democrats viewed him as they rushed to polish his boots with their tongues.  "Hottie Avenatti" became a meme. ... "Unprompted, several Democrats admiringly discussed Avenatti's physique to VICE News," ran one reporter's account, noting that "I have a thing for bald guys" was a typical remark.  (Great news, Joe Biden, you can take out your plugs!)

"He's in, right?  He's running for president and I think it's good he's here and I think that all the other candidates should also be showing support," Jane Kleeb, the chairwoman of the Nebraska Democratic party told Vice.  A party consultant added that Avenatti's background was no impediment to his path to the White House and was maybe even an asset.  "If it takes Stormy Daniels and Michael Avenatti to make the difference between people not going bankrupt over healthcare, then we'll take that deal[.] ... Even insiders are open to a new way of doing things."

This was less than four months ago: Peak Avenatti.  Since then his stock has followed somewhat of a Pets.com trajectory.

From the article, we learn the extent of adoration Democrats showered onto the fool – something I did not know, given how gross he was.  This indeed was the man once proclaimed by Democrats to be our savior from Trump.  That fizzled out, and Smith describes the pathetic porno lawyer's desperate attempt to keep grabbing the spotlight even after the initial Democratic Party adoration went kaput, chasing and chasing the cameras as he might chase an ambulance and ending up looking like the Rev. Al Sharpton in the wake of the Tawana Brawley fiasco.  After that, he started getting evicted and facing girlfriend-beating charges, with his prized client, porn "star" Stormy Daniels, distancing herself from him as all of this stuff made him look like the creep he really is.  Thrashing and thrashing, the more he resisted, the worse he looked.  Then the adoring Democrats started to abandon him...and disinvite him...and pretend they never knew him.

Eeeew.  What a way to end it.

Meanwhile, Smith, whose piece is hilarious, is getting to be one of my very favorite writers.

Image credit: Luke Harold, via Flickr // CC BY-SA 1.0

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