When girls' sports go nuts

A hundred years from now, will people be looking back at us today and saying, "Hooray for our ancestors who struck a blow for transsexual rights!"?  Or will their response be more like, "What the hell were they thinking?!"

The recent shattered records in girls' sports in Connecticut by runners who are boys is either a monumental leap forward for humanity and human rights or one of the wackiest and most pathetic moments since the crafty serpent in the Garden of Eden first whispered to Eve, "Psst, hey, lady...over here!"

Of course, there's another possibility: maybe what's happening with transgenders in sports is more of a fad or craze, like the ice bucket challenge or hula hoops?  And this nuttiness will soon end up on the ash heap of history.

When I was in high school many decades ago, if all that was necessary for a boy to get to step into the shower with the girls after gym class was a "sincere" declaration of believing he was really a girl trapped inside a boy's body, I know for a fact that one or two of my classmates would have suddenly started to feel more than a wee bit "pretty."  And if they were determined enough to keep up the charade for a sufficient amount of time — a semester, maybe — they'd be in shape for some good, clean fun.

"Feelings, nothing more than feelings," sang Morris Albert back in 1975, which could be the anthem for any boy today ready to "take a walk [or a shower] on the wild side" (to quote an even more apt lyrical phrase from the '70s) — or to clock some record-breaking wins in any number of female sports' competitions.

And what — or who — is going to stop them?

If a high school boy-turned-girlish wants to compete in a swim meet, for instance, with high school girls, is there a dad poolside willing to point out the less than streamlined swimsuit below the waist on one of the beefier "girls"?  Or is there a proud father up there in the stands at a track meet with some determination in his gait as he steps down onto the track to call a stop to the absurd shenanigans?

Well, I think most of us watching from the sidelines can agree: there are only a small number of guys with any real cojones in the stadiums or at the pools.  And it's those guys who are running in the competitions as girls.

A hundred years from now, will people be looking back at us today and saying, "Hooray for our ancestors who struck a blow for transsexual rights!"?  Or will their response be more like, "What the hell were they thinking?!"

The recent shattered records in girls' sports in Connecticut by runners who are boys is either a monumental leap forward for humanity and human rights or one of the wackiest and most pathetic moments since the crafty serpent in the Garden of Eden first whispered to Eve, "Psst, hey, lady...over here!"

Of course, there's another possibility: maybe what's happening with transgenders in sports is more of a fad or craze, like the ice bucket challenge or hula hoops?  And this nuttiness will soon end up on the ash heap of history.

When I was in high school many decades ago, if all that was necessary for a boy to get to step into the shower with the girls after gym class was a "sincere" declaration of believing he was really a girl trapped inside a boy's body, I know for a fact that one or two of my classmates would have suddenly started to feel more than a wee bit "pretty."  And if they were determined enough to keep up the charade for a sufficient amount of time — a semester, maybe — they'd be in shape for some good, clean fun.

"Feelings, nothing more than feelings," sang Morris Albert back in 1975, which could be the anthem for any boy today ready to "take a walk [or a shower] on the wild side" (to quote an even more apt lyrical phrase from the '70s) — or to clock some record-breaking wins in any number of female sports' competitions.

And what — or who — is going to stop them?

If a high school boy-turned-girlish wants to compete in a swim meet, for instance, with high school girls, is there a dad poolside willing to point out the less than streamlined swimsuit below the waist on one of the beefier "girls"?  Or is there a proud father up there in the stands at a track meet with some determination in his gait as he steps down onto the track to call a stop to the absurd shenanigans?

Well, I think most of us watching from the sidelines can agree: there are only a small number of guys with any real cojones in the stadiums or at the pools.  And it's those guys who are running in the competitions as girls.