Profiles in porridge

His name is Joe Biden. He is the emperor with no cognitive functioning. His pronouns are “Who, me?”

He served as Senator from Delaware so long that the state motto is now: “Delaware-so close to Washington, D.C. you can smell it.”

He is a Cafeteria Catholic -- someone who doesn’t subscribe to all of the doctrines of the Catholic Church.  Joe seems to have particular trouble with thou shall not kill and thou shall not steal. He’s not too strong on Thou Shalt Not Bear false witness against thy neighbor, either. 

He was “elected” by the biggest racketeering operation ever seen. Boss Tweed was both powerful and corrupt, but Boss Twerp had to leave all the shenanigans to lefties hired by the likes of Mark Zuckerberg, George Soros and Tom Steyer.

Joe couldn’t organize a kegger at a Kennedy Family Reunion.

Feeble Joe can’t even answer the softball questions served up by the servile media that helped perpetrate his fraudulent Installation.

His Cabinet is scarier than Doctor Caligari’s.

Just imagine: Pete Buttigieg stands like a colossus amongst them. They were chosen by color and gender and sexual preference with a few who might be holding information likely to expose Biden’s lifetime of graft, plagiarism and child-groping. 

He makes Gerald Ford look like Fred Astaire, falling up and down plane ramps even while being led around by the staff that writes his answers out (in crayon?) for him

Usually on his cuff.

Word has it he eats the crayons.

His wife is a Doctor of Education. She makes Lady McBeth and Hillary Clinton look like the Little Sisters of the Poor. Julius Caesar would recognize her as Ambitious -- and Caesar was an Honorable Man.

But Kill-Jill started harpooning Kamala Harris even before the election results were in: with visions of herself as Madame President dancing in her head.

Joe’s sons are a crackhead and a corpse that Ol’ Joe drags out every time an American loses a family member, usually the result of some moronic decision made by Blithering Joe.

Maybe someday we can look back and laugh, but it’s hard to keep your sense of humor when gas prices have doubled in the short 9 months since Joe was installed. We’ll be lucky if the price of everything else only doubles.

Meanwhile, Joe’s supporters have been given licenses to shoplift up to $1000 a day and defecate in the streets in the cities giving him the highest vote margins.

He’s filling the red states with unvaccinated Haitians, Latin Americans and terrorists posing as those who “helped” our armed forces in Afghanistan. Just imagine which radical, diseased population Chucklehead Joe will unleash next upon the American people.

Can the next border crisis featuring fundamentalist lepers with ebola be far behind?

I say it’s time we jettison Joe’s Secret Service protection: In its place a phalanx of so-called journalists has devoted themselves to protecting him at all costs. And it just seems cruel  to subject even one more Secret Service member to the retina-scarring spectacle of Joe Biden swimming in the nude.

This is satirical, and not all statements are literally true.

Ralph Alter is an art dealer and has been a regular contributor to American Thinker.

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