It's time to modernize the Selective Service System
Let's call this killing lots of birds with one stone, or maybe with one of the pro-regressives' wind-powered turbines. Currently, males are required to register for the Selective Service, and only males are subject to the draft. It doesn't matter whether they call themselves men or women; only those with 30 trillion XY chromosomes in their bodies are subject to this provision of the law.
It's time to change that, especially as the physical fitness requirements for military service seem to be softening. Let's include all those with 30 trillion XX chromosomes, too, even though they have one third less muscle mass than the others. That way, no matter what one calls oneself, which pronouns are on today's menu, or how one chooses to find sexual pleasure, the draft will make no distinction among our young people.
The draft requires all men in the United States to register within 30 days of their 18th birthday; within 30 days of their entry into the United States either as a permanent resident, refugee, asylee, or illegal alien; and within 30 days of the expiration of their non-immigrant visa, whichever category is applicable, until the age of 26. If we modernize the Selective Service laws, this would include "all" "genders."
Let's make registration begin at the age of 16. If teenagers are legally competent to choose to undergo life- and body-altering surgery and drug therapies, then they're certainly mature enough to be subject to the draft. Of course, deferment of call up until the age of 18 should apply to those making satisfactory progress toward their high school graduations.
Let's take the registration requirements out to the age of 30. After all, we don't want to miss inducting soldiers at their physical prime, especially after they have proven their fitness by walking most of the way here from a variety of airports south of Mexico.
Let's amend the Immigration and Nationality Act while we're at it. Currently, legal permanent residents may seek expedited citizenship through service in the military. However, this does not provide that silver path of citizenship to the golden streets of America for illegals. Let's allow illegals with one year of honorable service in the U.S. military to be able to apply for lawful permanent residence. Then, a year after receiving their new status, with continued honorable service, they would be eligible to apply for citizenship.
Homeland Security is overwhelmed trying to deal with the crisis at our southern border. They need help. Who better to call than the United States military? For some, soldiering is a primary skill; for others, it is secondary to other professional activities, from management, medicine, and logistics to billeting, transport, clerking, and cooking. Military personnel are very good at capturing and securing areas, facilities, and hostile forces. They can erect their concrete bunkers in a day and have mobile cafeterias, clinics, and supply depots stocked, organized, and operating in another.
Good ol' Joe is determined to bring our troops home from Afghanistan; that's maybe 3,500 fighters of a long war that may never be over. But if the philosophy of the Biden administration is that troops come home when war is over, what are we doing keeping 30,000 troops in Germany, 50,000 in Japan, and 8,000 in England — with whom we haven't been at war for more than 160 years? They're still shooting at us in Afghanistan.
Troops, active or reserve, would be an enormous help to DHS. They could lift the burden of managing the mass of illegals. DHS staff can focus on what's important — patrolling, surveilling, apprehension, and determining the threat level of those apprehended.
Once caught, let the military pick them up, house, feed, and clothe them. Let the military fingerprint, photograph, obtain biometric blood samples, conduct background checks, and manage their detention. While they are at it, the military can process those detained with respect to segregating those with criminal records from the rest.
The military can set up classrooms for the detained to begin studying English and be assessed for educational equivalency. While the migrants are waiting to be processed, they could get to work on their GEDs.
The military can provide clerical support, assisting those who will most likely be staying in the U.S. to obtain Social Security cards for identification. They can conduct medical exams, including providing the standard round of vaccinations required for all immigrants to the United States. They can handle the DNA testing necessary to support family reunification. Given that the vast bulk of the cartels' victims coming across the border are young men and women, the troops can register them for the Selective Service.
This may provide DHS with enough breathing room to be able to docket their hearings with immigration courts, provide notification letters for hearing dates, and explain the next steps. Much better than turning them loose, never to be seen again outside a jail cell.
Remember, Joe put Kamala in charge not just of the border, but of the jobs program also. And who's going to need those jobs more than the poor migrants swarming across our borders and sucking up blue-city resources like locusts?
CORRECTION: A phrase was missing that made clear that permanent legal residents may get expedited citizenship through serving in the military. That's now been fixed.
Anony Mee is a retired public servant.
Image: Andrea Widburg using public domain images.
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