Poor Leonardo Di Caprio (a poem)

I feel so sad for Leonardo di Caprio.

His life will be short.  He's been telling us so.

He'll dry up or crisp out,

What global warming's all about,

And with Al, his new pal, to a cooler place go.

Alas, he may turn into pixie dust

While the rest wait it out here and rust

Into creaky old age

Because we weren't sage

Enough  to heed his call or give him our trust.

Oh, windmill tilter! Oh, bold, shining knight!

But wait! What if he hasn't got it right?

Suppose it's all a hilarious hoax,

One of alarmists' quirky jokes.

He was misled!  Though he seems so bright.

Should he consult the sun?  Study history?

Maybe these can clear up the mystery

Of why the earth's warming,

Freezing cold and then storming.

Perhaps it's not my barbecue or SUV!

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