'Romney drops out of race, endorses Santorum'

The headline in quotes comes from Forbes blogger Len Burman.

If you need some help, check the date, and then read this wonderful parody:

In a surprise move, Mitt Romney announced today that he is ending his presidential campaign and throwing his support behind Rick Santorum.  The move shocked observers, including Senator Santorum, as Governor Romney seemed poised for a decisive victory in Wisconsin.

The governor, however, said he concluded that he has "no chance" to win the general election in December and that a Santorum candidacy in 2012 would be in the "best interest of the party." He explained, "It will save time. As many observers have pointed out, my defeat in 2012 will be interpreted by the party faithful as evidence that our problem is that we've become too pragmatic and moderate.  In 2016, we'll 'correct' that and nominate some right-wing nut and get demolished in the general election. It'll be like Goldwater in 1964.  I don't want to wait until 2020 to get my party back.  I'm all about efficiency.  Let's get our butts kicked now and move on."

When asked if he was worried that a Santorum thrashing in 2012 would also cause GOP losses in Congress, Romney said, "sure, but many of the losers will be those Tea Party nuts. If they go back home, Congress may actually be able to get some work done for the American people."

What makes this satire so effective is that there's just enough truth in reflecting what Romney actually believes that it's funny.

Read the whole thing and Happy April Fool's Day.


The headline in quotes comes from Forbes blogger Len Burman.

If you need some help, check the date, and then read this wonderful parody:

In a surprise move, Mitt Romney announced today that he is ending his presidential campaign and throwing his support behind Rick Santorum.  The move shocked observers, including Senator Santorum, as Governor Romney seemed poised for a decisive victory in Wisconsin.

The governor, however, said he concluded that he has "no chance" to win the general election in December and that a Santorum candidacy in 2012 would be in the "best interest of the party." He explained, "It will save time. As many observers have pointed out, my defeat in 2012 will be interpreted by the party faithful as evidence that our problem is that we've become too pragmatic and moderate.  In 2016, we'll 'correct' that and nominate some right-wing nut and get demolished in the general election. It'll be like Goldwater in 1964.  I don't want to wait until 2020 to get my party back.  I'm all about efficiency.  Let's get our butts kicked now and move on."

When asked if he was worried that a Santorum thrashing in 2012 would also cause GOP losses in Congress, Romney said, "sure, but many of the losers will be those Tea Party nuts. If they go back home, Congress may actually be able to get some work done for the American people."

What makes this satire so effective is that there's just enough truth in reflecting what Romney actually believes that it's funny.

Read the whole thing and Happy April Fool's Day.


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