Hunter Biden’s gun trial is set to begin sometime next month, and newly-filed court documents appear to reveal what strategy his lawyers intend to use in his defense; here’s what Bart Jansen at USA Today reported on the matter:

Hunter Biden’s lawyers are sparring with prosecutors in his federal gun case over the definition of drug ‘addict,’ as they prepare for trial to begin June 3.

The president’s son is charged with lying on a federal form and to a gun dealer about whether he was addicted to drugs when he bought a pistol in 2018.

…

But in court filings this week, Biden’s lawyers suggested he might deny being an ‘addict’ at the time of the purchase because he had just completed a stint in rehabilitation.

‘The terms ‘user or ‘addict’ are not defined on the form and were not explained to him,’ defense lawyer Abbe Lowell wrote in a filing Thursday. ‘Someone, like Mr. Biden who had just completed an 11-day rehabilitation program and lived with a sober companion after that, could surely believe he was not a present tense user or addict.’

The referenced form is ATF Form 4473, or Firearms Transaction Record, and it’s what you fill-out anytime you go to an establishment operating under an Federal Firearms License and purchase a firearm over-the-counter—now Hunter allegedly checked the “no” box for this question:

Are you an unlawful user of, or addicted to, marijuana or any depressant, stimulant, narcotic drug, or any other controlled substance?

Of course the honest answer for someone like Hunter Biden is a resounding yes, but as his lawyers argue, the FFL didn’t hand him a dictionary, and no one explained to him what it meant to be an addict, and now that they think about it, “addict” is actually a pretty vague term making it up for interpretation—at least when you’re the child of a corrupt Democrat anyway—so really it’s somebody else’s fault for sure, and Hunter is not guilty of lying on the form because he was only filling it out to the best of his ability.

Isn’t Hunter Biden a lawyer himself? Couldn’t one reasonably conclude that he has a decent enough grasp of the English language to understand what an “addict” is? And this is the loser that Joe Biden, the apparent president of the United States, asserted was the “smartest guy” he knew. How absurd.

So in an alternate reality where Hunter’s been clean for five minutes, he’s no longer an addict? What’s next? You’re no longer an “alien” (language used in some of the questions as well) as soon as you step foot into the nation, even though you entered illegally and you hold foreign citizenship?

Funny enough, the lawyers didn’t even try to claim he wasn’t using at the time he bought his gun, they simply say he’d completed a rehab program and lived with a sober companion—seems perfectly gray to me.

Now to be fair, Hunter did just lose the sugar daddy paying his legal bills, so he probably lost his best lawyers too and got stuck with a couple of quacks, but this is the stupidest excuse I think I’ve ever heard—which doesn’t necessarily mean it won’t work—but since none of them seem to grasp what an “addict” is, allow me to help them out, pro bono:

If you catch yourself digging through dirty carpet fibers and smoke old parmesan cheese shavings because you think it’s crack…you might be an addict.

If your drug habits are so shamefully notorious that one of the biggest hip-hop artists from the late 1990s and early 2000s explodes back onto the scene because he writes a viral hit called Hunter Got High and it’s all about your criminal behavior…you might be an addict.

BREAKING: This is officially the best and most important song of 2024

Pure fire 🔥

Hunter Got High By Afroman pic.twitter.com/BOwDhb9Kjn

— George (@BehizyTweets) April 29, 2024

If you record yourself on video squabbling with a prostitute about the weight of crack cocaine on a scale, so out of your mind on who knows what that you misread 20.7 as “two-point-seven without the bag”...you might be an addict:

If you’re the first person who comes to the minds of the entire nation when news hits that cocaine was discovered in the White House…you might be an addict.

If there is a plethora of video and photographic evidence of you doing hard and illegal drugs…you might be an addict.

If you’re splitting hairs over the difference between a meth pipe and a crack pipe as an attempt to cast reasonable doubt on a photo of you blitzed in a bathtub with some kind of drug pipe hanging out of your mouth…you might be an addict.

If sweaty, jittery antics followed by “bullet” sniffs is “normal” behavior for you in public…you might be an addict.

Remember that one time (roughly six weeks ago) when Hunter ripped a snort of cocaine from a device (generally referred to as a 'bullet') on the Truman Balcony of the White House...on the 4th of July with cameras rolling, and right next to children.

Class act, that kid. pic.twitter.com/Whrz6n6SLp

— AwakenedOutlaw⚒️ (@AwakenedOutlaw) August 14, 2023

If you go on national television and call yourself an addict…you might be an addict.

What am I forgetting?

Image from X.