How the ancient Romans dealt with statue problems

Some years ago, my wife and I toured the ancient sites where St. Paul lived and preached in Turkey. The tour guide pointed out the small heads and cracked necks on statues of Roman emperors who were also considered to be gods. This business of tearing down the statues of out of favor white men reminds me of the reasons for the microencephalic emperors that the guide offered.

The powers that be put up a statue of emperor #1 soon after his installation, but then, when the Praetorian guard wanted him out, the city fathers would, nominally, at least, have to get rid of his statue and carve another.  The Romans, being pinched for resources found an answer.  Break the head off Emperor #1 and carve the features of Emperor #2 onto that lump of marble.  Drill holes into the neck at the head end and another into the corresponding neck of the main body, and connect the two with an iron rod.  Woolah!  Emperor #2 has his statue.  Of course, the new head was smaller and grew even smaller with successive emperors.  Sic transit gloria mundi. 

I propose doing something similar with all of those statues that the BLM and Antifa crowd want to tear down.  Bronze and our modern sensibilities require a slightly different approach.  When the old hero has become shopworn, cut off the head, recast it with the visage of the new boy, and solder (or whatever you do with bronze) it onto the main body.  A new hero can be presented to the worshiping world!

An example might help advance the cause.  Let's say MLK is dethroned because of his perceived truculence toward women.  It should be easy and cheap for the then dominant radical feminists to make a statue of a woman to replace the disgraced civil rights leader. Cast the woman's head with her features, long hair, and the slight mustache that feminists sport.  Solder  this new head to the existing body.  The mainstream press can explain the man's suit because she must be trans...or something. 

Maybe foreseeing the evanescence of earthly fame might deter some of these iconoclasts (from the Greek meaning "image-breakers").

Erwin Haas is a retired infectious diseases physician, former flight surgeon in Vietnam, and city commissioner in Kentwood, Mich.