Sandy O's century

Had Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez been born on October 13, 1889 instead of 1989, what a difference one hundred years would have made.  Surely, the world would be a much better place today. 

With the conclusion of World War I, she could have introduced the nation to her hashtag #GreenNewDeal before the world even knew there was a hashtag.  With her life-saving policies in place, there would have been no "Roaring Twenties"!  No Great Depression!  No Dust Bowl crisis!  Most likely, no World War II!  No Korean War!  No Vietnam War!  No Middle East conflict!  No Israel to contend with!  No melting polar ice caps!  And no submerged coastlines!

We would sail across the Seven Seas onboard huge clipper ships and traverse the country in wind-driven railcars.  The horse and cattle populations would have been drastically reduced to prevent ozone-consuming methane gas emissions.  Only a scant few of these beasts of burden would be preserved.  Huge, ugly electrical power transmission lines would not spoil the landscape.  Unsightly oil rigs would not contaminate our coastlines.  Today's American would simmer under the same conditions and at the same wages they had at the turn of the century.

California would have never experienced the great wildfires of the early twentieth century — October 9, 1933 Griffith Park Fire; October 2, 1943 Hauser Canyon Fire; July 9, 1953 Rattlesnake; November 25, 1956 Inaja Fire; or November 1, 1966 Loop Fire — because climate change as we know it would have been averted by her New Green Deal.  In fact, her policies would have to acquire a new name because, most likely, FDR would have never faced a need to implement a New Deal.

However, her life-saving initiatives would have been too late to prevent the massive wildfires of 1910, known as the Big Blowout.  These fires, most likely generated by lightning strikes originated by the early warning signs of the pending postmodern climate change, charred millions of acres of timber, destroyed numerous small towns and villages, and killed nearly one hundred people — devastation brought about by the birth of the nation's automobile industry, coal- and wood-burning steam-driven locomotives, man-made industrial pollution, and American's Manifest Destiny concept.  Under the life-altering conditions brought on by these environmentally ravaging events, the climate change monster was conceived, and its evil tentacles leached its debauched, poisonous discharge into the fragile estuaries of the nation.

Imagine a world in which Ocasio-Cortez had been gifted that one-hundred-year head start!  With her intuitive guidance and unquestioned leadership, she would have been at the forefront of changing times, ready to squash those fledgling industries before they could ever gain a foothold on society.  She would have been there to abort the ugly climate change monster at its birth and stab her steely knife into the heart of the industrial movement — long before its evil consumer-driven addictions could be woven into the American fabric and stymied the technological evolution which gave birth to the modern lifestyle enjoyed by most Americans today.

Had Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez been born on October 13, 1889 instead of 1989, what a difference one hundred years would have made.  Surely, the world would be a much better place today. 

With the conclusion of World War I, she could have introduced the nation to her hashtag #GreenNewDeal before the world even knew there was a hashtag.  With her life-saving policies in place, there would have been no "Roaring Twenties"!  No Great Depression!  No Dust Bowl crisis!  Most likely, no World War II!  No Korean War!  No Vietnam War!  No Middle East conflict!  No Israel to contend with!  No melting polar ice caps!  And no submerged coastlines!

We would sail across the Seven Seas onboard huge clipper ships and traverse the country in wind-driven railcars.  The horse and cattle populations would have been drastically reduced to prevent ozone-consuming methane gas emissions.  Only a scant few of these beasts of burden would be preserved.  Huge, ugly electrical power transmission lines would not spoil the landscape.  Unsightly oil rigs would not contaminate our coastlines.  Today's American would simmer under the same conditions and at the same wages they had at the turn of the century.

California would have never experienced the great wildfires of the early twentieth century — October 9, 1933 Griffith Park Fire; October 2, 1943 Hauser Canyon Fire; July 9, 1953 Rattlesnake; November 25, 1956 Inaja Fire; or November 1, 1966 Loop Fire — because climate change as we know it would have been averted by her New Green Deal.  In fact, her policies would have to acquire a new name because, most likely, FDR would have never faced a need to implement a New Deal.

However, her life-saving initiatives would have been too late to prevent the massive wildfires of 1910, known as the Big Blowout.  These fires, most likely generated by lightning strikes originated by the early warning signs of the pending postmodern climate change, charred millions of acres of timber, destroyed numerous small towns and villages, and killed nearly one hundred people — devastation brought about by the birth of the nation's automobile industry, coal- and wood-burning steam-driven locomotives, man-made industrial pollution, and American's Manifest Destiny concept.  Under the life-altering conditions brought on by these environmentally ravaging events, the climate change monster was conceived, and its evil tentacles leached its debauched, poisonous discharge into the fragile estuaries of the nation.

Imagine a world in which Ocasio-Cortez had been gifted that one-hundred-year head start!  With her intuitive guidance and unquestioned leadership, she would have been at the forefront of changing times, ready to squash those fledgling industries before they could ever gain a foothold on society.  She would have been there to abort the ugly climate change monster at its birth and stab her steely knife into the heart of the industrial movement — long before its evil consumer-driven addictions could be woven into the American fabric and stymied the technological evolution which gave birth to the modern lifestyle enjoyed by most Americans today.