Been there, done that: CBS set to bore us with Stormy Daniels interview

The CBS television bumper ads are all over, breathlessly promising us, I don't know, maybe ecstasy, with their big, new, buxom interview, with, are you ready, Stormy Daniels, porn "star" extraordinaire who claims to have had an extra-marital affair with Donald Trump a decade ago and wants us all to know about it.

Pukeworthy. Who the heck cares what Trump did a decade ago? We all know he was randy then, what with his serial marriages and his framing of Marla Maples's statement "Best Sex I Ever Had," on the wall of his Trump building. We have been watching Trump for decades and we know all about this. Nobody is surprised in the least about it. And more to the point, we knew this and voted for him anyway. We know he's not a perfect guy, that's why his teaming up with Mike Pence (to maybe influence him a little) was such a good idea. It's taken care of. It's long ago. And we just don't care. We elected Trump to defend our values, or, as Howie Carr put it, be our "bodyguard."

But with 'Russia, Russia, Russia' imploding, Antifa a washout, #MeToo a bigger embarrassment for the leftwing celebrity establishment than the conservatives, and sure enough, we get Stormy Daniels from the desperate-for-ratings mainstream press.

Here's my take on the mess: Trump is a billionaire and seems to have had a divine-right-of-kings mentality around cheap women. He had a wife, and when he wanted, a mistress on the side. Between the mistress and himself (and maybe the wife, too, given the way he runs through wives), there was no soul relationship, no angst of being torn between two lovers, just some easy nookie from an inflatable blow-up doll imitation of a woman with her big plastic boob job. To us, it was just pukey.

Stormy Daniels // Caricature by Donkey Hotey, via CC0 2.0

Trump had the good sense to cover it up in a way he knew Daniels would respond to: with money, but he didn't think the matter through. A porn gal for hire is going to shoot through a $130,000 wad, the payoff amount, in about two months, and then go looking for more sales opportunities. His mistake was in not paying her enough, being too cheapskate the way billionaires often are, given her commercial availability. She wasn't going to stay quiet once the money ran out, especially not with all the varied and indirect means of making money off Trump that have come to her from a slavering and needy press since. She'll make a pile from endorsements, book deals, maybe paid interviews, which is a lot more than the original $130,000 payoff, which why she's doing it. A girl for sale always weighs her cost-benefit ratio and acts on the most beneficial path. Like I say, it's gag-inducing.

Carr points out that one reason this has no impact on Trump is that Democrats have already lowered the bar on sex among presidents. Carr cites Bill Clinton, of course, but it actually goes quite a bit further than that. John F. Kennedy, Lyndon Johnson, Franklin Delano Roosevelt and Jimmy Carter lustin' in his heart were all in the exact same league. You never heard anything like this from President Nixon, President Ford, President Reagan or either of the Bushes. So yes, we are all well aware of how Democrats lowered the bar over decades and are rather amazed that the press thiniks the bar must somehow be diffferent for Republicans so that they can sell stories. See, we're supposed to be titillated as well as outraged, all at the same time. Guess what? We're's not.

So now they are going ahead with their Stormy Daniels interview. I can't predict what the ratings will be on it, but I am sure the follow-on impact from the 'hard-hitting' media outlet will be ... zero. 

If you experience technical problems, please write to