Protecting the climate by trashing Mother Earth

Another spring day, another massive temper tantrum, exploding brain meltdown, euphemistically called a "march" protesting "climate change," by the real liberal-left now that their alt/antifa unwanted one-world, phony-science, no-tolerance-for-diversity has been massively rejected in the U.S. and Europe – not to mention the slaughterhouses of the Middle East and North Korea. 

On Saturday, there were so-called marches for the climate across the country.  Well, you can't really be against climate, can you?  It is there.  If you don't like the climate where you presently live, move.  Or buy some air conditioning or heating equipment.  But no, that doesn't work for the climatistas.  But yes, all the human hot air expended at these silly gathering certainly changed the immediate climate, unlike the several previous Ice Ages in which the climate-change cold cycle seemed to begin and then end several thousands of years later without any human interference. 

But then, during those cold, colder, coldest times, renowned environmentalist and climatologist Leonardo DiCaprio, in between being paid untold millions for acting gigs, wasn't around to enlighten the planet.  Now he is.  Dashing in from one of his many luxurious energy-guzzling homes – or maybe from one of his equally energy-guzzling yachts all well-stocked with nubile under-30 females – he proclaimed, "Climate Change is Real."  Well, who can argue with an authority like a Hollywood star?  The gaggle-eyed spineless resisters didn't.

Afterward, exhausted and exhilarated from the attention their childish, feel-good behavior, the overgrown climate marching mental two-year-olds departed, leaving behind, as two-year-olds do, their detritus – garbage – for others, the adults who don't believe in climate change, but in cleanliness, to clean up.  As happened on Earth Day/March for Science the week before.  As on the Women's March a few months earlier.  And the garbage from the March for Life before that.  Oh, wait...those marchers cleaned up after themselves.  What?  Wait!  Are the real planet lovers people who want kids and mostly don't believe in climate change?

Of course, the average reader didn't read about environmentalists' casual disregard for garbage on this delicate planet in any respectable Washington-based news outlet because they were busy preparing for the White House Correspondents Association dinner a few hours after the climate march.  The self-important correspondents missed the march, so they couldn't report on it and its trashy aftermath.  Instead, at the dinner, they heard trash talk from their master of ceremonies, a son of immigrants of some color, who criticized the president – "the elephant not in the room" – for doing his job of listening to the citizens of the country in person instead of through the warped "reporting" lens of those professionally assigned to the task.  Elephants!  Oh, the animal cultural appropriation!

Later at the dinner, Bob Woodward reassured the non-corresponding correspondents by addressing the absent Donald Trump (R): "Mr. President, the media is not fake news."  The fake news newsies applauded.  Bathed in self-love and desirable victimhood, the correspondents left their gathering, leaving the mainly minimum-wage staff to clean up after them, thus protecting the planet's climate.

And now today is May 1, so it is May Day, another phony holiday, another phony excuse for the left-wing fascists to publicly signal their virtue for their love of humanity and our planet by destroying it as in left-coast, coffee-addled Seattle

Which makes as much sense as phony science climate change.

But the planet endures; the climate continues to climate, while the planet lovers continue to destroy it.