College offers round-the-clock counseling for students 'troubled' by Halloween costumes
It's almost Halloween, and for colleges and universities across the country, that means numerous opportunities for students to demonstrate how sensitive they are to things like diversity, cultural appropriation, racism, sexism, classism, and any other politically correct "ism" that reduces the poor little snowflakes to quaking, quivering, wobbly bowls of Jell-O.
How to combat the coming onslaught of emotionally painful violations of right thinking? One college is offering around-the-clock counseling for students who find some costumes too much to bear.
The University of Florida wants students to know that if they’re offended or scared by Halloween, there’s counselors on hand to walk them through the traumatic experience.
“October brings fall weather and Halloween,” the university wrote in a blog titled “Halloween Costume Choices” posted to its website Monday.
“If you choose to participate in Halloween activities, we encourage you to think about your choices of costumes and themes. Some Halloween costumes reinforce stereotypes of particular races, genders, cultures, or religions,” it continues. “Regardless of intent, these costumes can perpetuate negative stereotypes, causing harm and offense to groups of people.”
The university then urges students to keep their costumes in check in the name of inclusion and diversity.
“The University of Florida’s Division of Student Affairs Diversity and Social Justice Statement reminds us that UF fosters a community that values and respects diversity,” the blog read. “An inclusive definition of diversity recognizes the variety of personal and social experiences that make individuals and communities different from one another.”
Also, for those traumatized by politically incorrect Halloween costumes, school counselors and the UF “Bias Education and Response Team” is standing by.
“As a community, we aspire to demonstrate integrity, respect, and compassion that strives to maintain an affirming campus climate for all members of our community,” according to the website. “If you are troubled by an incident that does occur, please know that there are many resources available. Please take advantage of the 7 day a week presence of the U Matter, We Care program … by emailing email@example.com. Additionally, there is a 24/7 counselor I the Counseling and Wellness Center available to speak by phone at 352-932-1575.
“Lastly, the Bias Education and Response Team at the University of Florida is able to respond to any reported incidents of bias, to educate those that were involved, and to provide support by connecting those that were impacted to the appropriate services and resources.”
I have no doubt what my friends and I would have done back in the day if the school had posted something like this. We would have found the most despicable, vile, politically incorrect costumes and paraded around the campus green, watching as students collapsed by the dozens.
But no one today on campus has that kind of sense of humor, so Halloween will be as bland and boring as National Secretaries Day.
What sort of costumes would make the banned list? Here are a few ideas:
1. Clown costume. Obviously.
2. Homemade ghost costume. What do you think the reaction would be if a student wore a white bedsheet to a black fraternity party?
3. Princess costume. This one offends on so many levels: sexist, class warfare, possible cultural appropriation.
4. Snow White costume. Need I say more?
5. Zombie costume. Appropriating the culture of the dead.
6. Pirate costume. Insensitive to criminals and overincarceration of murdering rapists.
7. Policeman costume. Eeek!
8. GI Joe costume. Double eeek!
I'm sure you can come up with a few more in the comments. Have at it.