Hey, President Obama: politicize this
Okay, President Barack Obama (D). You want to politicize mass shootings, so, agreeable person that I am, I'll help you do just that.
Why is it that Chicago, Illinois, your home town, located in C(r)ook County in the dead broke state of Illinois – all controlled by Democrats, especially the city and the county – has become notorious for the daily drip, drip count of shootings? Here are some typical recent ones.
Well, okay, you get the idea – as you said, you're tired of the same old, same old again and again. As for the shooters, well, they too are the same old, same old – or the same young. They usually look like the sons you might have had, as do most of the victims, or else a lot like Michelle's relatives. If not, they resemble the illegal immigrants you allow to enter the country. Very rarely do they resemble your mother's relatives.
Yeah, the shootings, while not as tragically compelling or newsworthy as the recent ones in Oregon or Chattanooga or other scenes of mass violence that grab the media's attention, have more horrific totals.
"Sensible, commonsense gun laws," you answer as a way of combatting this urban warfare. But...but...Chicago has some of the most restrictive gun laws in the nation, so owning a gun legally is difficult. But – and I'm sure this will come as a shock to the Obama and Robinson legal-beagle dream team, graduates of the best undergraduate and law schools in the country, even though we don't know your grades – the shooters don't care about such niceties as legally obtaining a gun by putting up with such pesky bureaucratic nonsense as background checks, licensing, and classes. Somehow, somewhere, these teenage shooters – and most of them are the age of your cute daughters – who rarely attend school, manage to get their hands on guns and shoot, shoot, shoot despite the best efforts of law enforcement. And yes, the latter do try. Yeah, I'm shocked, too.
Well, you know that old cliché: when guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns. Now that's common sense about guns.