Training tomorrow's Progressive Army

In 2016, President Obama issued an executive order mandating that all social, environmental, and other Federal regulations will be applied to all branches of military service.  The first group of Army volunteers has reported to training at Ft. Hood, Texas.

Days after the new executive order was issued, the Army volunteers reported to basic training.  The drill sergeant began to have some conflicts.

"Okay, gentlemen, this is the first day of your new life.  I will put you in shape to perform well in this man's army."

"Sir," one volunteers quipped, "you do not have the right to assume we are men.  There may be transgender persons here, and they have a right to have their personal gender identities respected."

"Are you trying to tell me how to run my outfit?" the sergeant states angrily.

"Sir, you are standing within my personal space and shouting in a very rude manner.  This can be construed as bullying and is no longer allowed."

"What do you mean, bullying?"  The sergeant got within an inch of the recruit's nose.  "I will speak to you in any way I please."

"Sir, you do not have that right," stated the recruit.  "Shouting and verbal abuse may be seen as an affront to my self-esteem."

"If you don't learn to fight the enemy and protect your own life, your self-esteem won't be worth anything anyway," said the sergeant.  "And what are you doing wearing that foreign flag patch on your shirt?  Don't you know what country you are fighting for?"

"Sir, it is a violation of United Nations rules for one nation to show a preference over others.  All nations are equal, and I'm entitled to my personal preference." 

"What personal preference?  You live in the United States.  You have no personal preferences in this army.  Do I make myself clear?"

"Sir, I am entitled to my personal preferences.  And I am now entitled, by a Supreme Court ruling, to have my personal needs fulfilled by the military."

"What personal needs?  I will tell you what you need."

"Sir, we now have a right to insist that our personal needs be met.  I personally can't eat anything that contains gluten or GMO-based ingredients.  In fact, the water I drink must be chlorine- and fluoride-free and have EPA-acceptable amounts of pesticides, fertilizers, VOCs, and so on.  I cannot eat anything produced from animals held in captivity, such as caged chickens.  I also cannot eat anything such as chicken, beef, or pork that comes from animals that were fed growth hormones or antibiotics, or that were slaughtered in inhumane ways.  Any shellfish I eat must not come from polluted water such as estuaries near industrialized areas.  Any fish I eat must have been caught in humane ways and not by large factory nets that trap dolphins and other innocent marine animals.  And none of the fish I eat can come from nations that are known to violate international regulations regarding the controlled harvesting of all wild species.  All packaging for my food and other items must come from recyclable sources.  I happen to know that several persons here are vegans, and of course their requirements are much stricter than mine.  They prefer organic fruit and vegetables, and nothing canned, processed, or laced with preservatives.   

"I know I speak for all of us when I state that we cannot participate in any training exercises that place carbon into the atmosphere, such as driving petroleum fuel-based vehicles.  I also cannot participate in any training exercises I deem may create a situation wherein I will suffer personal injury, emotional trauma, or a spiritual challenge to my personal beliefs.

"And of course, due to the rise in international immigration to the U.S., many of us do not speak English, and we have a right to have everything printed, and orders spoken to us, in our native language.

"None of us can be trained to operate weapons that may destroy the environment and place carbon into the atmosphere, such as artillery.  As you may already know, the president has closed all of the artillery ranges, since they threaten migratory birds, endangered reptiles, and rare plant species.  Of course, you would not want us to engage in any activity that has the potential to damage the environment.

"And out of respect for each other and other persons throughout the world, we do not expect to engage in any activity that will place other persons in danger or pose a threat of bodily harm to others.  In order to reduce traumatic stress, we cannot be trained to fire any kind of weapon or operate drones or tanks, since these activities show disrespect for the human rights of others and may lead to physical and emotional trauma.  And naturally, since we respect diversity, we cannot participate in any activities that enforce borders."

"And of course, all persons here must have their personal gender identities respected.  Those of us who are transgender expect our personal preferences, such as bathroom, shower, and sleeping facilities, to be met.  None of us can be placed into environments that would create any discomfort with regard to our personal gender and sexual preferences and needs.  And of course, I'm sure you would agree that our showers should use hot water from solar energy and that all the energy used must be based on renewable resources.

"Of course, Sir, I'm sure all of these things are obvious to you.  So when do we begin?"

In 2016, President Obama issued an executive order mandating that all social, environmental, and other Federal regulations will be applied to all branches of military service.  The first group of Army volunteers has reported to training at Ft. Hood, Texas.

Days after the new executive order was issued, the Army volunteers reported to basic training.  The drill sergeant began to have some conflicts.

"Okay, gentlemen, this is the first day of your new life.  I will put you in shape to perform well in this man's army."

"Sir," one volunteers quipped, "you do not have the right to assume we are men.  There may be transgender persons here, and they have a right to have their personal gender identities respected."

"Are you trying to tell me how to run my outfit?" the sergeant states angrily.

"Sir, you are standing within my personal space and shouting in a very rude manner.  This can be construed as bullying and is no longer allowed."

"What do you mean, bullying?"  The sergeant got within an inch of the recruit's nose.  "I will speak to you in any way I please."

"Sir, you do not have that right," stated the recruit.  "Shouting and verbal abuse may be seen as an affront to my self-esteem."

"If you don't learn to fight the enemy and protect your own life, your self-esteem won't be worth anything anyway," said the sergeant.  "And what are you doing wearing that foreign flag patch on your shirt?  Don't you know what country you are fighting for?"

"Sir, it is a violation of United Nations rules for one nation to show a preference over others.  All nations are equal, and I'm entitled to my personal preference." 

"What personal preference?  You live in the United States.  You have no personal preferences in this army.  Do I make myself clear?"

"Sir, I am entitled to my personal preferences.  And I am now entitled, by a Supreme Court ruling, to have my personal needs fulfilled by the military."

"What personal needs?  I will tell you what you need."

"Sir, we now have a right to insist that our personal needs be met.  I personally can't eat anything that contains gluten or GMO-based ingredients.  In fact, the water I drink must be chlorine- and fluoride-free and have EPA-acceptable amounts of pesticides, fertilizers, VOCs, and so on.  I cannot eat anything produced from animals held in captivity, such as caged chickens.  I also cannot eat anything such as chicken, beef, or pork that comes from animals that were fed growth hormones or antibiotics, or that were slaughtered in inhumane ways.  Any shellfish I eat must not come from polluted water such as estuaries near industrialized areas.  Any fish I eat must have been caught in humane ways and not by large factory nets that trap dolphins and other innocent marine animals.  And none of the fish I eat can come from nations that are known to violate international regulations regarding the controlled harvesting of all wild species.  All packaging for my food and other items must come from recyclable sources.  I happen to know that several persons here are vegans, and of course their requirements are much stricter than mine.  They prefer organic fruit and vegetables, and nothing canned, processed, or laced with preservatives.   

"I know I speak for all of us when I state that we cannot participate in any training exercises that place carbon into the atmosphere, such as driving petroleum fuel-based vehicles.  I also cannot participate in any training exercises I deem may create a situation wherein I will suffer personal injury, emotional trauma, or a spiritual challenge to my personal beliefs.

"And of course, due to the rise in international immigration to the U.S., many of us do not speak English, and we have a right to have everything printed, and orders spoken to us, in our native language.

"None of us can be trained to operate weapons that may destroy the environment and place carbon into the atmosphere, such as artillery.  As you may already know, the president has closed all of the artillery ranges, since they threaten migratory birds, endangered reptiles, and rare plant species.  Of course, you would not want us to engage in any activity that has the potential to damage the environment.

"And out of respect for each other and other persons throughout the world, we do not expect to engage in any activity that will place other persons in danger or pose a threat of bodily harm to others.  In order to reduce traumatic stress, we cannot be trained to fire any kind of weapon or operate drones or tanks, since these activities show disrespect for the human rights of others and may lead to physical and emotional trauma.  And naturally, since we respect diversity, we cannot participate in any activities that enforce borders."

"And of course, all persons here must have their personal gender identities respected.  Those of us who are transgender expect our personal preferences, such as bathroom, shower, and sleeping facilities, to be met.  None of us can be placed into environments that would create any discomfort with regard to our personal gender and sexual preferences and needs.  And of course, I'm sure you would agree that our showers should use hot water from solar energy and that all the energy used must be based on renewable resources.

"Of course, Sir, I'm sure all of these things are obvious to you.  So when do we begin?"