How To Lose Friends And Influence People
In these times of vitriol, when you either take a stand for what is right or become one of the sheep, invariably you are going to lose “friends.” But maybe they weren’t really friends to start with.
Certainly, President Trump doesn’t worry about lost friendships when he challenges Uni-Party idiocy. Nor do the MAGA Republicans that have kept their spine after entering Congress. Patriotic Americans who believe in Judeo-Christian values can’t worry about hurt feelings when pushing back at insane totalitarian groupthink.
Oh, but isn’t this contrary to what world renown Dale Carnegie preached when in 1936 he wrote his still best-seller How to Win Friends and Influence People? Written during the Depression, the book remains in print today. From a 1937 New York Times review:
… this authority on “public speaking and human relationships” tells us to smile and be friendly, not to argue or find fault, to get the other person’s point of view, encourage and praise him, let him talk all he wants to and persuade him that all the good ideas are his. He advises us also never to tell another person that he is wrong but adds that if we are wrong ourselves we can turn a liability into an asset by admitting it “quickly and emphatically.” If we do all that, we are pretty sure to win friends. And if in addition we have the wit to dramatize our own ideas, our salesmanship will profit the more.
In many instances, standing strong on your patriotic convictions brings new friends to replace feckless ones that follow the “herd of sheep” mentality. Here are two examples from my own life:
Example 1: Around 2006, I became friends with “C”, and it didn’t take long before we started affectionately calling each other sister. With my husband preferring home to travel, “C” and I took trips and cruises together. Television viewing was split between Home & Garden and Fox News.
One day in 2020, after sharing about a successful Trump rally I had organized, “C” texted that she no longer wanted to hear anything political from me. I could write about everything else going on in my life except politics and Donald Trump. Somehow, I was supposed to be ecstatic looking at photos of her grandson throwing up his first birthday cake, but my organizing a triumphant Trump car caravan was off-limits.
I am not sure what Dale Carnegie would have done in that situation, but I decided it was time to break up the sister act. In her place came many new like-minded political activist friends that I had met at Trump events.
Example 2: I’ve always found it interesting that former coworkers I never socialized with when we shared cubicle walls would Facebook me photos of their kids, along with vacation highlights and what they cooked for dinner.
One day “M” posted a photo of her two young children proudly displaying band-aids on their arms after receiving the COVID vaccine. In my opinion and the opinion of millions of other Americans, along with leading experts, it’s child abuse! That view, expressed in my native New York twang, wasn’t appreciated by “M’s” left-leaning friends.
Dale Carnegie would not have approved of my comment because he said never to tell another person he (or she) is wrong. (Carnegie must have been a great husband.) But it’s a view shared by many others. A Kaiser Foundation study reported that a majority of parents have no plans to get their younger children vaccinated. The leading reason is the concern about the vaccine’s long-term effects such as myocarditis.
Several months ago in Israel, one of the highest vaccinated nations, 93 doctors signed a statement saying, “We believe that not even a handful of children should be endangered through mass vaccination against a disease not dangerous to them.”
Former White House Advisor Peter Navarro didn’t mince words when he stated that vaccinating children, is “abuse at a minimum and murder in some cases.”
Be an influencer
Patriots need to use their influence, whether it’s large or small, to promote change. We can’t all be a cable news host like Tucker Carlson, a podcaster like Candace Owens, or a columnist like Mollie Hemingway. Our smaller centers of influence are just as critically important. Edmund Burke said, “Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little.”
Millions of patriot influencers are just as important (maybe even more so) than celebrity opinion hosts, podcasters, or columnists. Whether it’s thought-provoking remarks at family gatherings, a quick comment standing on the supermarket checkout line, writing letters to the editor, or posting on social media, you can be the person who influences others.
For me, it’s gratifying that my regular American Thinker columns and weekly Patriot Neighbors newsletter lets others know they aren’t alone in their MAGA views and offers information on MAGA events.
Yes, it’s overwhelming at times with the left-leaning media pushing the White House Marxist narrative. I also get pushback from Republican establishment organizations when taking opposing positions, such as not going along with the insanity that a biological man can be a woman. But for the United States to survive as a free republic, patriots must not be afraid to speak up even if it means losing “friends.” In the process, we gain new ones who firmly stand for Judeo-Christian patriotic values.
As Dale Carnegie once said, “Take a chance! All life is a chance. The man who goes furthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare.” I dare all patriots to influence others!
Robin Itzler can be reached at PatriotNeighbors@yahoo.com