More liberal metrosexual self-emasculation

A New York Daily news reporter, aptly named Gersh Kuntzmann, some time ago castrated himself with a very dull keyboard while writing a largely fictional account of his misadventures with an AR-15 rifle, a tale he foolishly tried to pass off as an authentic recounting of his trip to a firing range.  Gentle Gersh, a liberal pioneer in the fake news movement, came under heavy fire from genuine, knowledgeable gun owners for his patently dishonest article and under heavy ridicule from manly men everywhere for his inadvertent, yet very public self-emasculation.

I had no idea that we would have another confession from another liberal eunuch quite so quickly.

Brent Scher over at Washington Free Beacon reports that ThinkProgress senior editor Ned Resnikoff posted another one of these online orchidectomies on his Facebook page back in November, wherein he describes in almost tremulous tones his onset of phobias upon inviting a plumber, a white male with a Southern accent and a likely Trump voter, into his apartment to unclog a drain right after the election.

Here's the screenshot:

This afternoon had aplumber (sic) over to my apartment to fix a clogged drain. He was a perfectly nice guy and a consummate professional. But he was also a middle aged white man with a southern accent who seemed unperturbed by this week's news. And while I had him in the apartment, I couldn't stop thinking about whether he voted for Trump, whether he knew my last name is Jewish, and how that knowledge might change the interaction we were having inside my own home. I have no real reason to believe he was a Trump supporter or an anti-Semite, but in my uncertainty I couldn't shake the sense of potential danger. I was rattled for some time after he left.

I'm very privileged insofar as this sense of danger is unfamiliar to me. And I know I feel it much less acutely than a lot of other people right now. I'm still a straight, white guy who can phenotypically pass for gentile. Plus my first name is pretty WASP-y.

But today was a reminder that ambiguous social interactions now feel unsafe and unpredictable in a way that they never did before. And even if Trump is gone in four years, I don't expect to ever reclaim that feeling of security. That's just one more thing you voted for if you voted for him.

Aside from the fact that most American housewives can unclog a drain, I think Neddy's reassurance to himself that he's still a straight white guy who can phenotypically pass for gentile is rendered a bit feeble by the inclusion of that rather tentative still.  And rather than being concerned about passing for gentile, perhaps Ned should be more concerned about passing for a real guy, especially with that revelation that he was still rattled after the other guy, a possible (gasp!) Trump voter, was long gone.  I must tell you, that rings just a tad too effete for comfort to this old Trump-voting straight Southerner.

As for the plumber, the poor guy was probably rattled by the suspicion of furtive glances at his white, male, Southern, Trump-voting plumber's butt crack by a sensitive, circumcised, Semitic phenotype who can easily pass for a flaming Hillary LGBTQ social justice warrior.  Mind you, we're not saying any of our suspicions about you are true, Ned – they're just assumptions, just like those you made about your plumber.

See how all those profiling suspicions and assumptions can cut both ways, young Mr. Resnikoff?

A New York Daily news reporter, aptly named Gersh Kuntzmann, some time ago castrated himself with a very dull keyboard while writing a largely fictional account of his misadventures with an AR-15 rifle, a tale he foolishly tried to pass off as an authentic recounting of his trip to a firing range.  Gentle Gersh, a liberal pioneer in the fake news movement, came under heavy fire from genuine, knowledgeable gun owners for his patently dishonest article and under heavy ridicule from manly men everywhere for his inadvertent, yet very public self-emasculation.

I had no idea that we would have another confession from another liberal eunuch quite so quickly.

Brent Scher over at Washington Free Beacon reports that ThinkProgress senior editor Ned Resnikoff posted another one of these online orchidectomies on his Facebook page back in November, wherein he describes in almost tremulous tones his onset of phobias upon inviting a plumber, a white male with a Southern accent and a likely Trump voter, into his apartment to unclog a drain right after the election.

Here's the screenshot:

This afternoon had aplumber (sic) over to my apartment to fix a clogged drain. He was a perfectly nice guy and a consummate professional. But he was also a middle aged white man with a southern accent who seemed unperturbed by this week's news. And while I had him in the apartment, I couldn't stop thinking about whether he voted for Trump, whether he knew my last name is Jewish, and how that knowledge might change the interaction we were having inside my own home. I have no real reason to believe he was a Trump supporter or an anti-Semite, but in my uncertainty I couldn't shake the sense of potential danger. I was rattled for some time after he left.

I'm very privileged insofar as this sense of danger is unfamiliar to me. And I know I feel it much less acutely than a lot of other people right now. I'm still a straight, white guy who can phenotypically pass for gentile. Plus my first name is pretty WASP-y.

But today was a reminder that ambiguous social interactions now feel unsafe and unpredictable in a way that they never did before. And even if Trump is gone in four years, I don't expect to ever reclaim that feeling of security. That's just one more thing you voted for if you voted for him.

Aside from the fact that most American housewives can unclog a drain, I think Neddy's reassurance to himself that he's still a straight white guy who can phenotypically pass for gentile is rendered a bit feeble by the inclusion of that rather tentative still.  And rather than being concerned about passing for gentile, perhaps Ned should be more concerned about passing for a real guy, especially with that revelation that he was still rattled after the other guy, a possible (gasp!) Trump voter, was long gone.  I must tell you, that rings just a tad too effete for comfort to this old Trump-voting straight Southerner.

As for the plumber, the poor guy was probably rattled by the suspicion of furtive glances at his white, male, Southern, Trump-voting plumber's butt crack by a sensitive, circumcised, Semitic phenotype who can easily pass for a flaming Hillary LGBTQ social justice warrior.  Mind you, we're not saying any of our suspicions about you are true, Ned – they're just assumptions, just like those you made about your plumber.

See how all those profiling suspicions and assumptions can cut both ways, young Mr. Resnikoff?

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