'Abuela' Clinton panders for Latino votes

In an attempt to win votes, Abuela Hillary shamelessly panders to Latinos.  Since deciding to run for president, Hillary has played dominoes in Spanish Harlem, danced the merengue in Washington Heights, and told the Congressional Hispanic Caucus that "a taco truck on every corner" would be a great idea.

More recently, during an appearance on the Univision televisión show El Gordo y La Flaca, in addition to awkwardly dancing the salsa with a little person, Hillary was asked by the host, Raúl De Molina, aka El Gordo, and Lili Estefan, aka La Flaca, to name her favorite food.  

The same abuela who told the "Breakfast Club" hip-hop radio show that she wouldn't be caught lying unconscious on a New York City sidewalk without hot sauce in her pocketbook eagerly replied, "I think it would be Mexican food!"

This whole pandering thing makes one wonder whether Hillary thinks that in the home stretch, refried beans will deliver her the decisive edge over Donald Trump she thinks she may need.  

Speaking of Donald Trump, if this is really just about "taco bowl outreach," maybe Hillary can gather a few votes for herself by giving a shout-out to the Trump Grill, home to the best taco bowls in New York City.

Thus far, Hillary, who does have a "Victory Mac Daddy" ice cream sandwich named after her at "Mikey Likes It" ice cream parlor, has not had a dish bearing her name added to a menu by the cocineros.

Why?  Because the truth is that Hillary's public foray into Mexican cuisine has been only an occasional spin in the Scooby-Doo to the Chipotle Grill for Burrito Bowls.  And if Mexican food is what she really craves, why weren't tamales on her Thrillist media group list of preferred foods?

In the Thrillist article, the El Presidente-hopeful never even mentioned "Café El Presidente."  Instead, Abuela rattled off Italian at "Rao's"; gelato at "Northern Lights Creamery"; sandwiches at "Lange's Little Store"; and, among others, wine-flavored ice cream from "Mercer's Dairy," which she uses to wash down large chunks of meat that she purchases from "Charlie the Butcher."

And as always, "home girl" Hillary serves all those goodies up with copious amounts of hot sauce!

While pandering to Latinos for votes on "El Gordo y La Flaca," which translates, "The Fat Man and the Thin Lady," Hillary, who doesn't exactly fit into the "flaca" category, confessed that when banging back shots of tequila and gorging on quesadillas, she "watches portions" because, similar to Bill's struggles, "the problem never goes away."

During the Univision interview, Raúl and Lili also learned that Charlotte, Hillary's baby granddaughter, is in the process of becoming bilingual, and her language of choice is – you guessed it – español!

That's right: besides helping Mommy oversee an in-house mini-hospital, according to Grandma, little Charlotte Mezvinsky, who is barely two, is also learning español just in time to get out the Hispanic vote on November 8.

Perhaps, in the run-up to the election, the bilingual wunderkind could reason with #SomosVisible, the illegal immigrant rights protest group that recently blocked the George Washington Bridge.  Speaking to them in Spanish, Charlotte can take to the upper level and remind the protesters that her "Mi Sueño, Tu Voto" abuela is counting on their vote!

One can't help but wonder how the granddaughter of a former of Bosnian sniper fire victim started speaking Spanish at such a young age.

Perhaps the tot is becoming linguistically diverse after being exposed 24-7 to a Spanish-speaking nanny

Or maybe, while Mommy is in Arizona stumping for Abuela, Charlotte spends afternoons lounging around a $10-million Madison Avenue apartment with Abuelo Cuenta watching "Handy Manny" Garcia, which feature Grandpa's favorite cartoon character, Felipe the Phillips screwdriver. 

Either way, if it earns her a vote, the chalupa-loving abuela from Chappaqua has already proven she is shameless enough to exploit even her own grandchildren.  This means that if Donald Trump continues to impress black voters, Hillary may be forced to swallow the Cholula hot sauce and ask Bill's purported black son, Danney-Williams Clinton, to join her for a rally in Detroit.

Jeannie hosts a blog at www.jeannie-ology.com.

In an attempt to win votes, Abuela Hillary shamelessly panders to Latinos.  Since deciding to run for president, Hillary has played dominoes in Spanish Harlem, danced the merengue in Washington Heights, and told the Congressional Hispanic Caucus that "a taco truck on every corner" would be a great idea.

More recently, during an appearance on the Univision televisión show El Gordo y La Flaca, in addition to awkwardly dancing the salsa with a little person, Hillary was asked by the host, Raúl De Molina, aka El Gordo, and Lili Estefan, aka La Flaca, to name her favorite food.  

The same abuela who told the "Breakfast Club" hip-hop radio show that she wouldn't be caught lying unconscious on a New York City sidewalk without hot sauce in her pocketbook eagerly replied, "I think it would be Mexican food!"

This whole pandering thing makes one wonder whether Hillary thinks that in the home stretch, refried beans will deliver her the decisive edge over Donald Trump she thinks she may need.  

Speaking of Donald Trump, if this is really just about "taco bowl outreach," maybe Hillary can gather a few votes for herself by giving a shout-out to the Trump Grill, home to the best taco bowls in New York City.

Thus far, Hillary, who does have a "Victory Mac Daddy" ice cream sandwich named after her at "Mikey Likes It" ice cream parlor, has not had a dish bearing her name added to a menu by the cocineros.

Why?  Because the truth is that Hillary's public foray into Mexican cuisine has been only an occasional spin in the Scooby-Doo to the Chipotle Grill for Burrito Bowls.  And if Mexican food is what she really craves, why weren't tamales on her Thrillist media group list of preferred foods?

In the Thrillist article, the El Presidente-hopeful never even mentioned "Café El Presidente."  Instead, Abuela rattled off Italian at "Rao's"; gelato at "Northern Lights Creamery"; sandwiches at "Lange's Little Store"; and, among others, wine-flavored ice cream from "Mercer's Dairy," which she uses to wash down large chunks of meat that she purchases from "Charlie the Butcher."

And as always, "home girl" Hillary serves all those goodies up with copious amounts of hot sauce!

While pandering to Latinos for votes on "El Gordo y La Flaca," which translates, "The Fat Man and the Thin Lady," Hillary, who doesn't exactly fit into the "flaca" category, confessed that when banging back shots of tequila and gorging on quesadillas, she "watches portions" because, similar to Bill's struggles, "the problem never goes away."

During the Univision interview, Raúl and Lili also learned that Charlotte, Hillary's baby granddaughter, is in the process of becoming bilingual, and her language of choice is – you guessed it – español!

That's right: besides helping Mommy oversee an in-house mini-hospital, according to Grandma, little Charlotte Mezvinsky, who is barely two, is also learning español just in time to get out the Hispanic vote on November 8.

Perhaps, in the run-up to the election, the bilingual wunderkind could reason with #SomosVisible, the illegal immigrant rights protest group that recently blocked the George Washington Bridge.  Speaking to them in Spanish, Charlotte can take to the upper level and remind the protesters that her "Mi Sueño, Tu Voto" abuela is counting on their vote!

One can't help but wonder how the granddaughter of a former of Bosnian sniper fire victim started speaking Spanish at such a young age.

Perhaps the tot is becoming linguistically diverse after being exposed 24-7 to a Spanish-speaking nanny

Or maybe, while Mommy is in Arizona stumping for Abuela, Charlotte spends afternoons lounging around a $10-million Madison Avenue apartment with Abuelo Cuenta watching "Handy Manny" Garcia, which feature Grandpa's favorite cartoon character, Felipe the Phillips screwdriver. 

Either way, if it earns her a vote, the chalupa-loving abuela from Chappaqua has already proven she is shameless enough to exploit even her own grandchildren.  This means that if Donald Trump continues to impress black voters, Hillary may be forced to swallow the Cholula hot sauce and ask Bill's purported black son, Danney-Williams Clinton, to join her for a rally in Detroit.

Jeannie hosts a blog at www.jeannie-ology.com.