Baby boy born to celebrity monarch-in-waiting; world loses its mind
See also: Duke and Duchess Did their Duty
How low has America fallen?
In case you missed it, a baby boy, sired by a no talent who calls himself the "Duke of Cambridge" (the "Duck of Death"?) and was birthed by a girl from a very rich family who calls herself a "commoner," made a lot of elitist snobs around the world extremely happy. The baby, third in line to sit on a throne that's as anachronistic as it is silly, will live a life of privilege not based on merit, or talent, or brains, or even luck, but because his great-grandmama - who achieved her position due solely to who her father was - happens to be the hereditary ruler of England.
The world press deemed this insignificant event worthy of wall to wall coverage for a few hours, Obama apparently taking the day off - or, at least, not making any news himself. Meanwhile, 500 al-Qaeda terrorists slipped the leash in Iraq, 20 children were killed by Assad's forces in Syria, and Harry Reid accused Mitch McConnell of trying to "make love to the tea party." Any of those events has far more impact on the world than the birth of a rich kid who won't earn a dime of the fortune he is going to inherit, but will have the papparazzi falling all over themselves to document his growing up.
Remember: This is the year 2013:
The Duke of Cambridge said in a statement the couple "could not be happier". He and the duchess will remain in the hospital overnight.
The news has been displayed on an easel in the forecourt of Buckingham Palace in line with tradition.
A bulletin - signed by the Queen's gynaecologist Marcus Setchell, who led the medical team that delivered the baby - was taken by a royal aide from St Mary's to the palace under police escort.
The document said: "Her Royal Highness, the Duchess of Cambridge was safely delivered of a son at 4.24pm today.
Her Royal Highness and her child are both doing well."
When the news was announced, a large cheer went up from well-wishers and journalists outside the hospital while a large crowd greeted the posting of the bulletin outside Buckingham Palace.
The Kensington Palace press release said the Duke of Cambridge was present for the birth of his son, who will be known as the Prince of Cambridge and who is third in line to the throne.
"The Queen, The Duke of Edinburgh, The Prince of Wales, The Duchess of Cornwall, Prince Harry and members of both families have been informed and are delighted with the news," it said.
A Kensington Palace spokesman said the names of the baby - who was delivered in the private Lindo Wing of St Mary's - would be announced in due course.
The Prince of Wales, in a separate statement, said he and the Duchess of Cornwall were "overjoyed at the arrival of my first grandchild.
"It is an incredibly special moment for William and Catherine and we are so thrilled for them on the birth of their baby boy," he added.
A document announcing the birth of this whelp got a police escort from the hospital to FairyLand - er, Buckingham Palace? "Journalists" cheer the birth of one more rich kid coming into the world? Has the world lost its mind?
Americans don't like royalty. We don't care for titles (although Barbara Boxer apparently wants to be known officially as "Senator"). We think you should earn your way through the world (we hate the idle children of the idle rich as much as we hate royalty). And we believe that kings, queens, dukes, duchesses, barons, baroness's, and the keeper of the privy became outdated right around 1776.
It is unseemly in a federal republic to go gaga over the birth of someone who will never even get close to the hereditary title of "Head of State." And yet, a significant percentage of Americans were interested enough in this story to stay glued to their TV's while the cable nets breathlessly reported all the gory details.
Even as celebrities, this dysfunctional, cold hearted family are failures. They rarely do anything interesting, except cheat on their spouses. It's time to move on, people. This is the 21st century, not the 19th. It is an insult to the collective intelligence of the world that anyone pays any attention to these throwbacks.