The Top Ten Ways to Celebrate an Obama Halloween

#10 Lure kids to the house with the promise of "shovel ready" candy.

#9 Incite "trick-or-treaters" to violence by posting videos on YouTube denigrating Halloween.

#8 Hand out 1st lady baby carrots and low-fat ranch dressing instead of candy

#7 Hand out "ObamaPhones" along with the candy (Ohio only).

#6 Don't give out any candy, but tell the kids, "Hey, you can stay on your parent's health insurance until age 26.  What else do you want?"

#5 Scare the kids by saying, "I see rich people."

#4 Don't give out any of your own candy; rather, indignantly dictate how much candy your neighbors should be giving out.

#3 Check the bags of all trick-or-treaters and redistribute as needed to "spread the wealth around."

#2 Don't compliment especially good costumes.  Instead, remind the kids that "they didn't make that...somebody else made that."

#1 If you run out of candy, blame it on the previous homeowner.

M. Allen Fritsch is an entrepreneur and business owner.  He is a graduate of the United States Military Academy and a former Army officer.  The scariest thing he can think of for this Halloween is "four more years" of an Obama administration.

#10 Lure kids to the house with the promise of "shovel ready" candy.

#9 Incite "trick-or-treaters" to violence by posting videos on YouTube denigrating Halloween.

#8 Hand out 1st lady baby carrots and low-fat ranch dressing instead of candy

#7 Hand out "ObamaPhones" along with the candy (Ohio only).

#6 Don't give out any candy, but tell the kids, "Hey, you can stay on your parent's health insurance until age 26.  What else do you want?"

#5 Scare the kids by saying, "I see rich people."

#4 Don't give out any of your own candy; rather, indignantly dictate how much candy your neighbors should be giving out.

#3 Check the bags of all trick-or-treaters and redistribute as needed to "spread the wealth around."

#2 Don't compliment especially good costumes.  Instead, remind the kids that "they didn't make that...somebody else made that."

#1 If you run out of candy, blame it on the previous homeowner.

M. Allen Fritsch is an entrepreneur and business owner.  He is a graduate of the United States Military Academy and a former Army officer.  The scariest thing he can think of for this Halloween is "four more years" of an Obama administration.

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