Charlie Sheen bombs in Detroit

One down nineteen to go, maybe.  Charlie Sheen’s “Violent Torpedo of Truth” tour kicked off in the Motor City Saturday night at the Fox Theatre.  The highly anticipated (by Charlie) twenty city vindication tour has already run off the rails.  The New York Post reports that the unknown (and likely to remain that way) comic who opened for Sheen was booed off the stage, setting the tone for the rest of the evenings “entertainment”.

When Sheen strutted out, he ripped off his shirt and revealed a Detroit Tigers jersey and earned a standing ovation.  That would be the last of the cheers.

 

The “Wall Street” actor then underwent a major league meltdown, ranting about Thomas Jefferson and Sarah Palin and making bizarre promises to the crowd like “freedom from monkey eyed…sweat-eating whores.”

 

“Is anybody else as confused by this s--- as I am?” he asked them.

 

The Tinseltown train wreck said he’d “tell some stories about crack.  I figured Detroit was a good place to tell some crack stories.”

 

“I don’t do crack anymore, but this is a good f-----g night to do some crack,” he said as the disappointed crowd of 5,000 which paid up to $80 to see the show, let loose a chorus of jeers.

Seeking to win over the increasingly hostile audience, Sheen quipped “I’ve already got your money dude.”  Things continued to spiral out of control like, well, like Charlie Sheen’s career as more and more disappointed fans headed for the exits.  Shortly after a video montage which must have been developed before Charlie quit using crack, the former star cut his performance short and slithered backstage amid a chorus of boos.

Chris Acchione, who made the trip from Toronto to see Sheen’s live implosion asked “Is there a bigger loser in the world?” 

After starring in “Major League” and “Major League II,” the actor who played Ricky “Wild Thing” Vaughn did not appear in the final film in the series, “Major League, Back to the Minors.”  Something tells me that even the Minors wouldn’t be a good option for Charlie and his new routine because it would never play in Peoria. 

Hey Charlie how about Madison, Wisconsin?   The union protesters cheered Richard Trumka, Jesse Jackson and Michael Moore during their pathetic routines, all you need to do is just dumb-down your act a little bit for the public school teachers in the mob.

April 3, 2011

paboehmke@yahoo.com