The Green Aston Martin

Lee Kayser
The prince arrived in his Aston Martin

And told his mum the Queen

"I fear we'll be in a coffin

If we don't all go green"


"We are in an awful snare.

All the telltale clues

Have been reported everywhere.

It's been in all the news"


"Where there used to be there is no ice

The earth is getting dry.

What Al Gore has said thrice

Cannot be a lie"


The Queen furrowed her brow

As she sucked upon a mint.

"I say, is it too late now

To reduce our carbon footprint"


The prince looked worried, then he said

"I'll begin a serious gambit

To save our subjects from the dead

 I shall save the planet"


Across his meadows he gazed

And wondered where to start

There before him cattle grazed

"I'll begin with the simple cow fart"


Never one to be delayed

He called his men and one farm lass

And ordered study to be made

On cows farting methane gas


Next he called his Butlers, Chefs, and Hatters

And ordered them to thinking

About green footprint matters

Then he went to drinking


Resting now, sipping wine

Weary from his labor

He plucked a grape from the vine

Hanging from the arbor


Then a plan began to form

He nurtured it with care

Thinking outside the norm

Too unorthodox to share


Workers sworn to secrecy

Began work upon his plan

Hidden now, no one could see

The Aston Martin drops its pan.


They tweaked and twiddled through the night

And even days on end

Until they had things just right

Success was just around the bend.


The Royal cheese men brought the whey

The vine men brought the plonk

It was blessed and stirred throughout a day

By one devoted Buddhist monk.


The Martin sat beside fermented brew

The smell was foul and rank

The Royal mechanic sneezed "Ah Choo"!

Then poured it in the tank


Breath is held and key is turned

A great moment to enthrall

The foul brew being burned

Is a special blend of ethanol


The Martin runs down the roads

The Prince with face a shine

Rolling past peasant abodes

Powered by cheese and wine


Now you may think it silly, maybe even sleazy

But some elite writers raved

Al Gore may now rest easy

For the planet has been saved!


UK Daily Mail:
Prince Charles converts his beloved Aston Martin to a green machine... run on English wine
The prince arrived in his Aston Martin

And told his mum the Queen

"I fear we'll be in a coffin

If we don't all go green"


"We are in an awful snare.

All the telltale clues

Have been reported everywhere.

It's been in all the news"


"Where there used to be there is no ice

The earth is getting dry.

What Al Gore has said thrice

Cannot be a lie"


The Queen furrowed her brow

As she sucked upon a mint.

"I say, is it too late now

To reduce our carbon footprint"


The prince looked worried, then he said

"I'll begin a serious gambit

To save our subjects from the dead

 I shall save the planet"


Across his meadows he gazed

And wondered where to start

There before him cattle grazed

"I'll begin with the simple cow fart"


Never one to be delayed

He called his men and one farm lass

And ordered study to be made

On cows farting methane gas


Next he called his Butlers, Chefs, and Hatters

And ordered them to thinking

About green footprint matters

Then he went to drinking


Resting now, sipping wine

Weary from his labor

He plucked a grape from the vine

Hanging from the arbor


Then a plan began to form

He nurtured it with care

Thinking outside the norm

Too unorthodox to share


Workers sworn to secrecy

Began work upon his plan

Hidden now, no one could see

The Aston Martin drops its pan.


They tweaked and twiddled through the night

And even days on end

Until they had things just right

Success was just around the bend.


The Royal cheese men brought the whey

The vine men brought the plonk

It was blessed and stirred throughout a day

By one devoted Buddhist monk.


The Martin sat beside fermented brew

The smell was foul and rank

The Royal mechanic sneezed "Ah Choo"!

Then poured it in the tank


Breath is held and key is turned

A great moment to enthrall

The foul brew being burned

Is a special blend of ethanol


The Martin runs down the roads

The Prince with face a shine

Rolling past peasant abodes

Powered by cheese and wine


Now you may think it silly, maybe even sleazy

But some elite writers raved

Al Gore may now rest easy

For the planet has been saved!


UK Daily Mail:
Prince Charles converts his beloved Aston Martin to a green machine... run on English wine