Al Gore Goes Elmer Gantry

Albert Gore, Jr.  has finally found his calling. After flunking out of Vanderbilt* Divinity School, following Dad into the family business (a US Senate seat from Tennessee), finally discovering a Woman's Right to Choose and becoming the Clintons' Veep; after refusing for weeks to concede Florida to George W. Bush in 2000, thereby envenoming the Bush presidency from day one; after sulking and bulking up for years and accusing Mr. Bush of "playing on our fears," an ever more corpulent Mr. Gore has discovered his vocation in life as the Prophet of Planetary Doom, jetting high over our heads predicting hell and damnation for billions of sinners enjoying their simple lives below.

Unfortunately, Planetary Doom is Sci Fi. But faith can move mountains, and by comparison to mountains, aging rock singers are much easier to lead by the nose. The result of all the hoo-hah was the eminently forgettable Live Earth extravaganza, which just flopped like a beached Great White whale. Which is a very fitting metaphor for Mr. Gore himself, helplessly stranded on the muddy shoals of life, never to be President, even though Dad and Mom Gore groomed him from birth for that sure destiny.

The comparison between Al Gore and Elmer Gantry is hard to resist, the main difference being that Elmer Gantry was a fictional mixture of the populist preachers of Sinclair Lewis' time. But Gantry was solidly based on fact, just as Al Gore is deeply entrenched in fiction.  A shrewd mix of fact and fiction is the stock in trade of many a carnival barker and politician.

Both Elmer and Al are basically Southern-style demagogues; both are cagey PR preachers who have made it pay very well, thank you; both have lives of dubious moral standing. (Remember the 1996 immigrant legalization fraud? The impoverished Buddhist nuns in LA who suddenly provided mucho dinero to Al Gore's presidential campaign? Remember Al Gore Sr., who was reputedly in the deep pockets of Soviet KGB paymaster Armand Hammer for many years?  

When Al Gore adopted the voice and dialect of a Black Baptist preacher in the 2000 election, most of us cringed in embarrassment. Looking back, it may have been a moment of true self-discovery. Ever since, Mr. Gore has been morphing into a very secular Old Testament Jeremiah. It has made him rich and famous. His daughter recently picked up his son from the local police station in her 400 horsepower V-8 Maserati. The Gores take care of their own.

No doubt the Nobel Peace Prize Committee will be drawn to Al Gore as their next Nobel Laureate, following in the footsteps of such as Yasser Arafat, the well-known Bringer of Peace to the Middle East. There's a sucker born every minute, and mooning, swooning Lefties of the Nordic variety are just asking for it. Mr. Gore will satisy their desire to be bamboozled and have their guilt assuaged at the same time, just as Elmer Gantry would have. The liberal world is full of Gantrys, for the demand by millions of minds hungering to believe in something is readily accommodated in our capitalistic free society, socialist rhetoric to the contrary notwithstanding.

Despite the media-crafted image of the GOP as home to hypocritical religious demagogues, it is the Democratic Party in which more snake oil peddling faith healers find a home, albeit disguised as non-religious in nature. Sadly, the Left's starry-eyed faith in demagogues like Gore, the Clintons, Edwards, John Fraud Kerry, and yes, even Obama (the White Man's Hope for Absolution of Guilt At Last), is destined to be disappointed, time and time again. Politicians are but human, and may be even more fallible than most of us. They have far more opportunities to be misled and corrupted, after all. Power, as Lord Acton said so well, tends to corrupt.

So in the upshot America has lucked out again. Al Gore was not president for the last eight years. Now there's something to be thankful for.

*Thanks to alert readers for correcting the mistaken assertion that Gore flunked out of Yale Divinity School.

James Lewis blogs at
http://www.dangeroustimes.wordpress.com/
Albert Gore, Jr.  has finally found his calling. After flunking out of Vanderbilt* Divinity School, following Dad into the family business (a US Senate seat from Tennessee), finally discovering a Woman's Right to Choose and becoming the Clintons' Veep; after refusing for weeks to concede Florida to George W. Bush in 2000, thereby envenoming the Bush presidency from day one; after sulking and bulking up for years and accusing Mr. Bush of "playing on our fears," an ever more corpulent Mr. Gore has discovered his vocation in life as the Prophet of Planetary Doom, jetting high over our heads predicting hell and damnation for billions of sinners enjoying their simple lives below.

Unfortunately, Planetary Doom is Sci Fi. But faith can move mountains, and by comparison to mountains, aging rock singers are much easier to lead by the nose. The result of all the hoo-hah was the eminently forgettable Live Earth extravaganza, which just flopped like a beached Great White whale. Which is a very fitting metaphor for Mr. Gore himself, helplessly stranded on the muddy shoals of life, never to be President, even though Dad and Mom Gore groomed him from birth for that sure destiny.

The comparison between Al Gore and Elmer Gantry is hard to resist, the main difference being that Elmer Gantry was a fictional mixture of the populist preachers of Sinclair Lewis' time. But Gantry was solidly based on fact, just as Al Gore is deeply entrenched in fiction.  A shrewd mix of fact and fiction is the stock in trade of many a carnival barker and politician.

Both Elmer and Al are basically Southern-style demagogues; both are cagey PR preachers who have made it pay very well, thank you; both have lives of dubious moral standing. (Remember the 1996 immigrant legalization fraud? The impoverished Buddhist nuns in LA who suddenly provided mucho dinero to Al Gore's presidential campaign? Remember Al Gore Sr., who was reputedly in the deep pockets of Soviet KGB paymaster Armand Hammer for many years?  

When Al Gore adopted the voice and dialect of a Black Baptist preacher in the 2000 election, most of us cringed in embarrassment. Looking back, it may have been a moment of true self-discovery. Ever since, Mr. Gore has been morphing into a very secular Old Testament Jeremiah. It has made him rich and famous. His daughter recently picked up his son from the local police station in her 400 horsepower V-8 Maserati. The Gores take care of their own.

No doubt the Nobel Peace Prize Committee will be drawn to Al Gore as their next Nobel Laureate, following in the footsteps of such as Yasser Arafat, the well-known Bringer of Peace to the Middle East. There's a sucker born every minute, and mooning, swooning Lefties of the Nordic variety are just asking for it. Mr. Gore will satisy their desire to be bamboozled and have their guilt assuaged at the same time, just as Elmer Gantry would have. The liberal world is full of Gantrys, for the demand by millions of minds hungering to believe in something is readily accommodated in our capitalistic free society, socialist rhetoric to the contrary notwithstanding.

Despite the media-crafted image of the GOP as home to hypocritical religious demagogues, it is the Democratic Party in which more snake oil peddling faith healers find a home, albeit disguised as non-religious in nature. Sadly, the Left's starry-eyed faith in demagogues like Gore, the Clintons, Edwards, John Fraud Kerry, and yes, even Obama (the White Man's Hope for Absolution of Guilt At Last), is destined to be disappointed, time and time again. Politicians are but human, and may be even more fallible than most of us. They have far more opportunities to be misled and corrupted, after all. Power, as Lord Acton said so well, tends to corrupt.

So in the upshot America has lucked out again. Al Gore was not president for the last eight years. Now there's something to be thankful for.

*Thanks to alert readers for correcting the mistaken assertion that Gore flunked out of Yale Divinity School.

James Lewis blogs at
http://www.dangeroustimes.wordpress.com/