January 13, 2013
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March 17, 2007

Gov. Richardson: For the Entertainment Value

By Christopher J. Alleva
Governor Bill Richardson of New Mexico probably doesn't have much of a shot at the Democrats' presidential nomination. But as a Hispanic, he is considered a definite possibility for the veep slot. If only for the entertainment value, he deserves serious scrutiny.

In the crazy upside down world of Washington we get to see a never ending parade of the odd and bizarre. Who can possibly forget when Elvis showed up at the White House, stoned out his mind, calling on President Nixon asking to get deputized as an honorary narcotics agent. No doubt this was a medium rare experience for the White House staff. I'm sure they were thinking to themselves "How great is this gig; the freak show comes right to our door." The archival record of this meeting captured in the iconic photograph shown at the link is priceless.

The details of the meeting as recorded by Nixon staffer Bud Krogh are absoulutly amazing. Using prose as dry as the Sahara desert, Krogh takes us through a blow by blow description of this historic summit. From Elvis excitedly showing Nixon his state police badges from California, Colorado, and Tennessee to his spontaneous hug at the end we get all we need to know and much, much more. I love the part where Nixon tells Elvis he knows how hard it is to perform in Vegas.

Just when you think any of this can't be topped we learn from Nixon's gracious thank you letter that Elvis gave him a Colt 45 pistol as a gift for the occasion. 

Genuine color like this seems much scarcer these days. But perhaps if Bill Richardson comes back to Washington he can at least give us a glimmer. Last Wednesday, The Politico reported an allegation that Richardson is liberally inclined (to touch women)
"New Mexico Gov. Bill Richardson's 2008 presidential campaign has been burdened by unusually public discussion about his behavior with women.

The lieutenant governor of New Mexico, Diane Denish was quoted in the Albuquerque Journal saying she avoids standing or sitting near Richardson because of his physical manner, which she said was not improper but was "annoying." The governor, she said, "pinches my neck. He touches my hip, my thigh, sort of the side of my leg."

Richardson, in an interview with The Politico, denied behaving inappropriately, calling the talk "mean-spirited." Still, the concerns have become enough of a headwind for Richardson's campaign that the candidate has a more substantive response -- that his personal conduct was vetted, and effectively given a seal of approval, when he was considered for the vice presidential nomination by John F. Kerry in 2004. "
Well there you have it, vetted by John Kerry not to worry. Yes, this is all normal, pinching and touching strange women at a business meetings. Who am I to judge? One of the apparent objects of the Governor's tactile adventures says it's not improper, just annoying.

This is not Richardson's first endeavor at bizzaro explanations. In November of 2005 via AP we got this nugget from Richardson:
"For nearly four decades, Richardson, often mentioned as a possible Democratic presidential candidate, has maintained he was drafted by the Kansas City Athletics.

"The claim was included in a brief biography released when Richardson successfully ran for Congress in 1982. A White House news release in 1997 mentioned it when he was about to be named U.S. ambassador to the United Nations. And several news organizations, including The Associated Press, have reported it as fact over the years. But an investigation by the Albuquerque Journal found no record of Richardson being drafted by the A's, who have since moved to Oakland, or any other team. Informed by the newspaper of its findings, the governor acknowledged the error in a story in Thursday's editions.

"After being notified of the situation and after researching the matter ... I came to the conclusion that I was not drafted by the A's," he said.
Ace of Spades wrote a hilarious reaction to this story that deserves a repeat.

"Glad the research cleared that up.

"And in that forthcoming spirit, I need to inform you that some of my statements about myself may have created a misunderstanding or two in the minds of readers of this site.  As a result of my research, I have come to the conclusion that I am NOT, in fact, married to Monica Bellucci. I'm sorry my previous, mistaken statements created this impression.

"Furthermore, I am to understand, we have not been living together on a private estate in Northwestern Italy either. What I mistook, perhaps carelessly, for a small Tuscan villa, research now leads me to believe is, almost certainly, my mother's basement. And records reveal my companion there is not Ms. Bellucci, but, in fact, my brother Lloyd...I want to apologize to my readers for the confusion."
Something tells me Richardson is really going to deliver on this go around. Creative excuses like these are an art and Richardson appears to be a veritable prodigy. You can never tell what will capture the press' and public's imagination. Hopefully Richardson will have some more goodies for us.  
on "Gov. Richardson: For the Entertainment Value"